Tryout Advice & Thoughts after 12 years as a Club Volleyball Parent

My daughters, Avalon and Devon, are 5 years apart in age and both started playing club volleyball in 5th grade. At 11s and 12s, Avalon played club volleyball locally (she’s now 23), while I was still playing pro beach volleyball on the AVP and the FIVB World Tour. It’s been 12 years total of travel club volleyball with my youngest, Devon, just finishing her 18s club season this year. She’s heading to college camp soon.

I’m excited to no longer hear whistles ringing in my head, being the last ones in the convention center at 11PM, my legs and feet falling off because I can’t sit still, figuring out food and water for my kid along with thousands of other people in the same building and hotel, living off of bananas, coffee, and protein bars…and having my emotions running wild with the momentum swings that come with each volleyball game. There is also so much I will miss…most of all, watching my daughter and her team play and spending quality time with her traveling. You may be in the middle of your child playing club volleyball, if they are a freshman or sophomore, OR just getting started at 11s or 12s watching your player, like a puppy, out there discovering how to play.

No matter what point you’re at in your club volleyball journey, I have some advice and things I’ve realized that I hope will help you:

I think 11s and 12s are too young to tryout for a TRAVEL club team. My daughter’s didn’t tryout for a travel club team until 13s because I couldn’t do it with my older daughter, Avalon, while I was still playing pro beach volleyball. It was too much traveling. I thought if she’s going to be good at 16s, it doesn’t matter whether or not she travels when she’s 11s and 12s. Both of my daughters played on local club teams at these younger ages and improved their technique and skill level. Your player will have plenty of time to travel for volleyball at 13s-18s, there’s no rush and it will not effect their chances of playing in college.
Don’t be a multi-year club switcher, if you can help it. We switched clubs twice with my older daughter..went to a different club at 14s, then back to the original club. With my younger daughter, we switched clubs once at 14s and stayed. Switching clubs is hard on the family, but sometimes there are good reasons like the coaching, club atmosphere, the team your player makes, the position your player will play, team unity, and other families.
Advocate for the position your player could play later (15s-16s) when they are younger (11s-13s), if you have an idea. It’s so hard because when volleyball players are 11s-13s/14s they are developing as players, they are growing, and getting stronger…BUT if a player wants to be a setter and decides at 14s to switch to setting, it’s sometimes too late. If she has great hands, quick feet, and is a critical thinker who likes setting…even if she’s tall-ish, advocate as a parent for her to set and hit when she’s younger. Another example, if your daughter is the tallest on the team at 12s and forced to be a middle blocker, but you think she won’t be tall at 16, advocate for her to work on passing and become an outside hitter. As I write this, it’s hard, because I also tell players to do what’s best for the team and play the position the team needs, BUT in club volleyball tryouts at the younger ages (11s-13s/14s) it’s really important to identify your player’s position (even though the club coaches might not agree) and have them tryout for that position. The coaches will pick what they need for each team. If you know nothing about volleyball, ask someone you trust that does and get a 2nd opinion. The difference in the level of play between 1s, 2s, and 3s teams at 11s-13s is much less noticeable. They are ALL learning and ALL puppies/Bambis out there on the court! It doesn’t effect recruiting and it’s ALL about development and getting to set or getting to pass, for example. Learning ball control at a young age is huge! Then, if the player grows even taller later and becomes a really good hitter, they have actually passed in serve receive since they were 11 and it’s part of their game. They can become an impact player for a team, both passing and hitting.
Get the best coach possible. The club where your player is playing is really just court space their coach is using. Your player’s coach is usually an independent contractor for the club. In practice and when coaching in tournaments, it’s really ALL up to the coach. Club directors set some parameters, have suggested drills and ways to communicate with your team, but club coaches are given a lot of autonomy. Ask around…past parents and players of the club coaches your player gets offered to play for and you can also “google” them and do some research that way, if you like. A club’s positive atmosphere, culture, and surroundings are a “nice to have”, but having a good coach is more important than any of that. It’s important that the coach has a role for your player to play on the team and is committed to developing them to be the best volleyball player they can be while on their team. If the coach is doing this for EVERY player, the team will be focused and committed to each other as a whole.
If your player wants to do private lessons, find a coach that specializes in their position or played their position themselves, if possible. Also, see if your player can do lessons with coaches that are coaching in your player’s age group. The more they can be seen before tryouts and the coaches can put a face to a name the better. This can help to set your player up for success and be placed on the right team for them. If they attend pre-tryout camps and clinics, that’s great also.
It’s not about how good your player is, it’s about what position they play and where they rank in the gym at tryouts among other players in that same position. Each club team takes a certain number of players in each position per team. 2 Setters, 2-3 Middles, 2-3 L/DS, 2 Right Sides, 2-3 Outside Hitters that can pass. Sometimes a Right Side can play Middle (and vise versa) and an Outside Hitter can play Right Side, so the roster is somewhat fluid in case of injuries or players not working out in a certain position and they play better in another position. This is another reason to do private lessons with club coaches in your player’s age group or with coaches that have a role in deciding the teams. If a coach or two know your player and their ability it can help them to be placed on a team where they will have a role. For example, if a player is a good setter, but there are other setters in the gym that have more experience on a top team, are taller and stronger, or are quicker and set more consistently to the locations, they may cause this player to be placed on a lower team, even though they are really good.
There can be big differences in level of play between clubs. Sometimes a top team at one club is the level of the 3rd or 4th team at another club. Don’t chase the number of the team…chase the coach, team commitment, and the team’s schedule (if they will travel to big tournaments).
Players need to use their club recruiting person and keep them up to date on their recruiting process. If you have a person at your club that handles recruiting they can really help your process. Do private lessons with them once in a while (if they are a good coach and helping you) throughout the club season. The more they know you as a person and player, the more they can speak up for you to college coaches. The more diligence they see from you in the recruiting process and you giving them updates, the easier it will be for them to talk positively about you!
During tryouts, if a club coach offers your player a spot on their team and tells them any version of the following: ”You will play. You will start. You will play this position and “so and so” will play that position. We’re building our team around you. We will run a 5-1 with you. We will run a 6-2…etc.” You CANNOT believe it or take it into account when deciding which team or club to play for, because NO coach actually knows this. If a coach or club director tells parents or players these things in order for them to join their team or to not be upset when they find out what other players (in your position) are joining the team, look out…and have eyes wide open!
As a club parent, help and participate as much as possible. Over the course of 12 years, I’ve been the parent that does a lot for my daughter’s team, I’ve been the parent that does nothing and hides, and I’ve been everything in between. The attitude and energy you bring to your player’s club volleyball experience is crucial. No matter what the experience is like, it’s best to nod and smile, UNLESS there is some type of abuse or bullying going on from the coach or teammates. Stay positive with your player in the car and at home. Be a listening ear for your player, if they need to vent. Don’t gossip with your player or parents on the team. When talking to other parents, you can stand there and smile and hear way more than you ever wanted to know. Control what you can control and walk away, excuse yourself, smile, and don’t contribute to it. If you help with the food, team bonding activities, coaches gifts, or whatever…it helps the overall atmosphere and feel of the team. Players love knowing they have supportive parents and it definitely can’t hurt…it can only help!
Remember that club volleyball is a business and there is really no loyalty. A club will take a new player from another club, another state, another area, if they are a great player and better than a player that has been at their club in the same position for years. The same holds true for many players…if given the opportunity to be on a “better” team with a “better” coach that is ranked higher nationally or has many other good players moving to the club, a player will go…even if they have been playing at their current club for many years. Everyone does what’s best for them. I’m not saying this is right or wrong, it’s just the way it is. There are gray areas in between, like with lower ranked teams within a club, there is usually more loyalty both ways when the stakes aren’t as high.
If you are a “difficult” parent, word will get out among the club coaches at tryouts. Almost every player is replaceable, so if you’re a parent that complained to the coach, called meetings demanding playing time for your player, and/or yelled at the refs during matches, your player will have a hard time making a good team the following year. The next coach your player has will probably set parameters around your behavior and it could affect your player’s playing time, if you don’t follow the parameters.
I get nervous if there are more than 12 players on a club team. If your player is the 13th or 14th player, understand what their role will be on the team. A reason I would be OK with this situation is if your player is 15s or younger and on a top team with an EXCELLENT coach that runs great, fast practices working on technique. Then, all of the players are getting better, playing at a higher level and faster speed of the game in practice. This could be a great situation for a raw, athletic player that is growing, learning, and can make a huge jump in skill level in one club season in this environment, but maybe not quite there to play much in tournaments. Then, hopefully, by the last half of the season the 13th player has made strides in skill level and could possibly threaten to beat out a starter in their position!
I recommend players play in the age group of their high school grad class. There are many reasons, case by case, volleyball players play up an age group, but I think it’s better for recruiting to play in your class, unless a player is much more skilled and physical than their peers and still getting playing time. This happens sometimes when top tier players are younger and then eventually they play twice at 16s or 17s. I don’t recommend playing down, when a player is young for their grade. I don’t recommend playing up from 17s to 18s because 18s have a shorter season and college coaches don’t watch 18s as much. If your player is playing in a different age division than their class at 15s, 16s, or 17s, the emails to college coaches need to bring this to their attention, so everything makes sense.
Lifting weights is HUGE for a volleyball player’s success on the court. Both of my daughters started lifting weights at home with dumbbells, low weight/high reps at around 13 years old. Weight lifting helps with injury prevention and it also helps with speed, explosiveness off the floor, changing direction, and hitting harder. Also, strong hands, from holding the weights, helps players become better at setting, blocking, hitting harder, and overhead digging. A disclaimer: I’m not a certified trainer! So this is only my opinion from many years of experience as a player myself. Because I lifted weights, I became the best player I could be and it helped my confidence on the court tremendously in college and professionally.
I have gained lifelong friendships with a few of the moms that will be with me forever. We have been a support for each other through some of the most difficult times of our lives. We understand each other and have been a listening ear in the convention center folding chairs, while we watched our daughters compete. Life things, death things, delirious things, and everything in between.

I hope you have gained some insight from this article that will help you in your club volleyball journey. Playing volleyball is a great way for young athletes to become good teammates, form a strong work ethic and desire to improve in a sport they love. If they are interested in playing volleyball in college, this is the place to be and I can help you get started! You got this!