I have many parents ask me how they can help, what they can do, what’s OK for them to do? Parents, you can be a support to your child, like a recruiting assistant, in the recruiting process, but you cannot do it for them. Here are some ways you can help and it’s a win-win for both your volleyball player and your family.
Do some initial background work.
Talk to them about whether or not they want to play volleyball in college. Confirm they are willing to do the work of creating a target list and emailing coaches to get started. If they aren’t sure, they can start the recruiting process and begin to learn more. Help them to understand that playing volleyball in college isn’t easy. In fact, it will likely be the most challenging thing they’ve done, thus far! They need to have a deep desire to play volleyball in college to work through the ups and downs of the recruiting process. I’ve supported my own daughters through the process and I’ve worked with many players. I’ve also helped some players figure out they don’t want to play in college, and that’s OK too! I’ve always thought that if a player does the hard work in the recruiting process and finds the right fit where they become verbally committed, they have what it takes to, most likely, shine at the college level. The recruiting process is very hard, so it’s a wonderful accomplishment to reach the end. It is also important to have the parents’ support because it’s the player’s decision combined with the family. It has to work for the family too and parents play a key role.
Be your child’s #1 cheerleader (this goes without saying), but I need to say it!
It is SO hard to do this 100% of the time because sometimes your kids drive you crazy! I’ve been there and I understand. I have felt like a nag, at times. I’ve also been frustrated and I jokingly asked one parent I worked with, “I’ll tell your daughter to send out her emails and then can you tell mine to also?”
What does being your child’s #1 cheerleader look like? Listening to them, mirroring back their frustration or excitement to them and validating it. NOT losing YOUR cool and becoming emotional, but letting them show their emotions. Let them ask you questions when they are ready. Remember it’s NOT about you, just always let them know you are there for them and it will be OK. If there is a huge blow up or anything where you all question what you’re doing with this recruiting stuff anyway, STOP, take a breath and come back to it later. Apologize if you lost your cool and move forward. It takes a lot of patience. There are many ups and downs in the process, but you CAN get through it and find a good fit!
Do the highlight video work, if they need your help.
I wrote an article called Make a Good Highlight Video that will Engage College Coaches – Here’s How! In the article, I break down, in detail, how to take the video and get the best angles, then how to edit the video, by position, that makes it easier for college coaches to watch. I highly recommend a company called Balltimeto make the raw video editing job a lot faster and easier! This is the one part of the recruiting process I’m OK with parents taking the load, EXCEPT I think it’s great for the players to pick the highlights themselves, so after you’ve pulled them have your child help to make the final pick!
- Help them create their target list through research and discussion.
A player’s target list, when they are targeting the right level for them, can be GOLDEN and make a huge difference in their recruiting process. In my opinion, a player’s target list of schools can make or break their recruiting process. I wrote an article called How to Create Your College Volleyball Target List…You Got This! I provide step-by-step details on organizing it and a good structure I like to use with my players. I think it’s great to decide schools on the players list by division and conferences within the divisions. I created a guide to help you also, you can grab here. You can help your child by pulling conferences and listing out the schools within conferences that you both think could be their level. Ask them to look up the locations, majors, and look at the volleyball team page on the school website. Find ways to watch them play on TV or online and encourage your player to watch different teams play to get a feel for the level of play. The NCAA Member Directory is super helpful to get a feel for where the schools are on the map and breaking them down by divisions and conferences. I’ve had several parents provide the extra help their child needed, just by suggesting conferences and schools, then their player thinks about them, researches them, and adds them to their list…or not. - Be a 2nd pair of eyes scanning the emails they send to college coaches.
It’s great to have another pair of eyes to double and triple check the emails before they go out. Parents can help by scanning the email for spelling and grammatical errors. Also, it’s even MORE important to make sure that the coaches names match the school name in the body of the email, which also matches the emails in the “TO:” area before the player hits “SEND”!
Ask your child to read this article. If you are a player reading this article, use your parents as a resource, let them be your recruiting assistant! The sooner you start the process as a freshman or older, the more “in control” you will feel and less stressed you will be throughout. Your child will learn so much about themselves, and their likes and dislikes, as they move through the recruiting process. Please join my Facebook Group for more resources and guidance – College Volleyball Recruiting for Parents (and players too!). You got this!